Pregnant Lady Cranky Pants

Week 16
November 24, 2008
Mom

The top ten answers I give at parties when my husband, the sportswriter who covers the Giants, is not with me:

10. I'm not sure if Eli Manning is really that boring.
9. No, I don't really know any of the secret strategies of the team.
8. No, he isn't a fan of any team.
7. No, really, his job requires him to be impartial.
6. OK, maybe he rooted for the Redskins when he was 10.
5. No, he cannot get you tickets person I met 15 seconds ago.
4. No, he goes to every game and doesn't watch it on TV from our living room. Yes, even the ones that are far away.
3. Yes, he actually meets, talks to and interviews the players. Yes, even (insert player de jour here). Yes, in the locker room. Yes, sometimes they are naked.
2. No, he cannot introduce you to (player mentioned above). What was your name again?
1. No, I'm not always this cranky. I'm just not allowed to drink wine in my condition, nor am I allowed to bop you over the head with something heavy.

Repeat for every new person she meets.

I might have had a bad day yesterday.